When I had my baby, I was told something so many new moms hear: “Don’t worry, breastfeeding will help you lose the baby weight.” But that wasn’t my reality at all. Instead of shedding pounds, I gained more.

I wish I could say the weight just melted off, but it didn’t. Instead, I found myself hungrier than I had ever been in my life, truly ravenous, as if my body was demanding every calorie it could get. No matter what I ate, the cravings never seemed to stop, constantly tugging at my mind with a relentless insistence that made it difficult to focus on anything else. I found myself reaching for snacks throughout the day, sometimes mindlessly, as I battled against the overwhelming urge to indulge. And when I tried to diet in hopes of shedding those extra pounds, I noticed a drop in my milk supply, which left me feeling defeated and anxious.

It was a painful realization that my body was at war with itself. It felt like I had to choose between nourishing my baby, who depended on me entirely, and nourishing myself, which was equally important for my well-being. This internal struggle left me feeling trapped, caught in a cycle of guilt and desire, as I tried to navigate the challenges of motherhood while also caring for my health.

The Never-Ending Hunger and Guilt

Breastfeeding hunger hit me harder than anything I’ve ever experienced. I would eat a full meal and then be starving again an hour later, feeling as if my body was in a constant state of craving. The insatiable appetite was overwhelming, leaving me perplexed and frustrated. Every mom blog and forum told me it was normal, but that didn’t stop the guilt from creeping in. I felt like I was failing at “bouncing back,” as if I should somehow be able to control my hunger.

The weight of societal expectations added to my anxiety, making me question whether I was nourishing my baby adequately while grappling with my own needs. The struggle to find balance was real, and I often wished for more understanding and support during this exhausting period of motherhood.

Some days, I looked in the mirror and didn’t even recognize myself. My clothes didn’t fit. My body didn’t feel like mine anymore. And that constant battle with food made me feel ashamed and frustrated.

Finding Comfort in Clothes That Actually Fit

One thing that helped, at least a little, was finding clothes that made me comfortable. For the longest time, I held off on buying new clothes in a bigger size, thinking I would fit back into my old wardrobe soon. I told myself this was only temporary and I would lose the weight soon, but as time passed, I realized that I needed to embrace my new body instead of fighting against it.

I discovered some really great postpartum-friendly pieces on Amazon that I still wear daily, and they’ve truly transformed the way I feel about myself. Flowing tops, high-waisted leggings, and soft lounge dresses that stretch with me instead of squeezing me have become staples in my wardrobe. Each piece not only flatters my figure but also provides the comfort I crave during long days spent caring for my little one. Choosing clothes that align with my current lifestyle has not only made me feel more confident but also empowered me to celebrate this phase of motherhood.

No, they haven’t fixed the deeper issue I was struggling with, but they have helped me feel more confident, especially on the days I can barely hold it together. When your body feels foreign, even something as small as a comfy pair of leggings can make a huge difference.

The Regret That Breaks My Heart

Here’s something I don’t tell many people: I have almost no pictures with my son. Not because I didn’t want them, but because I hated the way I looked. Every time I picked up the camera, I made an excuse not to be in the photo, convincing myself that it was better for both of us if I stayed behind the lens. I would focus on capturing his laughter, his milestones, and those fleeting moments of joy, allowing myself to become lost in the beauty of parenting from the sidelines.

And now? I regret it deeply.

I wish someone had told me that my baby doesn’t care if I’m skinny or if I still look pregnant months later. He doesn’t see “fat” or “flawed”—he only sees his mama. He sees my smile, my arms holding him close, my love shining through. That’s what matters. Not the number on the scale.

You Are Not Alone in This

Through Facebook mom groups, I realized I wasn’t the only one feeling this way. I connected with other moms who were also struggling with postpartum weight gain, body changes, and that constant guilt of not doing enough. Hearing their stories helped me feel less isolated and reminded me that every body heals differently.

So if you’re reading this right now and struggling to love your new body postpartum, please know this: You are not alone. There is no rush to “bounce back.” The most important thing you can do is be there for your baby.

And please—take the photos. Even if you don’t love the way you look right now. One day, those pictures will be treasures, and your child will see nothing but love.

Let’s Be Real Together

I’m still in the thick of it. I haven’t figured everything out. I still struggle with my body image and I’m still learning to give myself grace. But I’m sharing this because I don’t want any other mom to feel as alone as I did.

If you ever need someone to talk to, or even just a safe space to vent about how tough it is to love your postpartum body, I’m here. 💕 Motherhood is hard, but it’s easier when we remind each other that we’re in this together.

P.S. A few of the clothes that have helped me feel more comfortable postpartum are linked here. This is an affiliate link, which means I may earn a small commission if you purchase through them, at no extra cost to you. No pressure at all, I just wanted to share in case they help you feel a little better too!